( the big bang )

March 23, 2011

a tumblr post
riddled with angst
but i saved it, i couldn't help myself
i'd stare at it and think,
that's so sad
that's how i'm feeling
every day

i am having a hard time
with where i am
and what i'm doing

working full time
in a job that is supposed to be creative
yet produces the same old work
again and again

then coming home late
and working until the wee hours
on my shop

a place that truly feels creative
a place that really has to have
its own point of view
in order to survive
{ hopefully thrive }

and the answer was there
but it felt slightly insane
a bit foolish
and more than a little selfish

walk away from the steady job
to embrace the one i love

it's nuts, right?


i did it.

i walked away

so what does it all mean? more happiness. more vintage. more handmade. more blogging. more shop updates. more work. more play. and more fun. i might even find my way back to the kitchen. { for the past two years, i've really only been responsible for the production of my morning latte and occasional batches of cookies. pretty sure ramen noodles don't count as cooking. }

it's scary. but in the end, i think it would be even scarier
to have never tried at all.

{ phew. it feels great to have all that off my chest. }

25 notes:

  1. As they say, be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid. From the way you are describing how you have been feeling it seems like this was something that you needed to do. Best of luck with everything! :)

  2. you made the right choice...no matter what happens down the line. looking forward to seeing more of you xox

  3. This is so exciting! I can't wait to see where you're headed--great things are in store for you, I'm sure of it.

  4. YES YES. Y-E-S.

    so happy for you - here's to embracing the foolish, and doing something that is truly fulfilling!

  5. thank you all... now i propose a toast with an imaginary glass of bubbly. hold out your glasses, i'll fill 'em up!

    your kind words do mean so much to me. xoxo.

  6. WOW! That is exactly how I'm feeling, and am perched on the brink, waiting for the right moment of clear-minded insanity to hit me and give me the courage to leap off this crazy train. Bravo!

  7. yay you!
    i imagine only wonderful things coming from this...

  8. jump and the net will follow! you already have an amazing shop and i know that you will have great success...with loads of hard work of course, but is there anything more fun? good luck to you!

  9. that is so marvelous! I'm really proud of you and what you described sounds scary but also such a delight! I wish you all the best my dear, it's so well deserved!

  10. good girl! I was wondering when- if- you might do that.. congratulations! you are made for etsy success

  11. Congratulations!!! You already know I love your shop. This will bring amazing opportunities in your life; I know it:)

  12. aw jeez, you all sure know how to put a smile on a girl's face. i feel so honored & lucky to have such wonderful people to share my thoughts, fears and high hopes with. thank you. really.

  13. Good for you. I did it myself about 12 months ago and haven't looked back. Things are certainly different, but I absolutely feel more authentically 'me'. Best wishes, K

  14. oreosforbreakfastMarch 23, 2011 at 7:57 PM

    Ah! Now I know why your blog always makes me feel beautiful and brave; how could it not when you so obviously are both yourself? Congratulations.

  15. hooray for big giant leaps and great adventures! congratulations! cheers and hugs to you!

  16. @oreosforbreakfast that may be the nicest thing anyone's ever said. { ever } thank you so much

    @prettylittlethieves skipping and jumping! when i saw your "high five me" print today, i thought... that's just exactly how i feel!

  17. I love your blog and your critters. You are one of my new daily look-see's! Keep it up and we'll be there. Love the name!

  18. I never commented but I discovered your blog a little while ago, and I love the things you make, the atmosphere.
    I can relate to your post as I'm a bit in the same situation, with a job supposedely "artistic" and so on, and the temptation to switch to something more personal, more "me".

  19. oh my goodness--i'm so proud of your courage. i was just in a professional development workshop for artists this weekend and one thing we had to do was write about our dream--what would we do if we got a grant for 30,000--of course, i was like: quit my day job and make art! i can't do it yet, but i so relate to your struggle. i spend 40 hours at work and another 20+ on my art and trying to find shops to carry it and photographing and researching and promoting. it's wonderful and exhausting. i wish i could do what you've done, and i will someday. good luck! your bravery clears a little more space on the path for the rest of us. your shop and blog are among my very favorites. like another posting said--we'll be here for you.

  20. R, I'm so proud of you! I knew this day would come!!!! I know you know this but you will work harder then you ever have but it will be worth every minute of it. If you ever look back at your old life as an employee of someone else's company it will only be to question why you didn't do this sooner. I'm here for you to share in the excitement, joy, late nights, early mornings, and best of all true happiness since you are doing exactly what you want and should be doing!

  21. it's like you are writing my thoughts, exactly what i'm thinking...except for the last part, the triumphant step out into the unknown. still working on the courage for that one. i'm so excited for you, that you have taken this step. congrats, i know it will be amazing for you!


    i struggle with much the same predicament. spending all day in an office and fighting with the energy to do something that i love in those too-short-hours before bed.

    i think it's amazing that you took the leap and i bet the leap will meet you back for your efforts.


  23. I think there should be a Hallmark card with the sentiment: "Congratulations on Quitting your Job!" on the cover, and inside "Now you can Love what you Do & Do what you Love!"
    Good on you for knowing you had to take that leap, and for taking that leap. It's a hard jump, but so meaningful.

  24. You walked away! Wow! I'm so happy for you, and envious of your courage and determination. You are already great. Think of how much greater you will be!