there and back again

June 3, 2013




the thing i've been fighting about writing this blog has something to do with generalization. writing for a wider, and sometimes unknown, audience. i am not really an audience kind of person. i'm a one-on-one kind of person, and a rather private person at that. it can be a bit daunting to throw my words and thoughts to the wind, and wonder how they catch your sails. in truth, there is one person in all the world i write well for. for that person, i like the way my words roll and whisper. (i like myself when i'm with you.) and when i write to all of you at once, i hear the words tripping over themselves, halting and faltering. i find myself second guessing and editing and paring all real truth and meaning out of things... just in case you won't like it.

i needed a break from that doubt and indecision. a month of much needed air. during which, while i may not have quite found my footing, i have at least turned myself in a more honest direction. (west is best.)

i know a few of you from your friendly hallos and the way you poke your heads 'round the door to say howdy-do. i love that, i really do. but i am going to stop thinking of all of you at once and write for just one. and if you don't like it, you will take your leave and we will part ways gracefully in this faceless internet place. and if you do stay, maybe you'd like to sit for a cup of tea with me, and we will have a few minutes in the afternoon, discussing the bits of life that are true and beautiful. and maybe sometimes the bits that are sad and imperfect, and later we will realize they were just as beautiful in their own way.

(the image has little to do with things. except maybe the way air plants have an uncertain between-ness that reminds me of how i felt about writing here. it's hard to be neither one thing nor the other. we all want to be something, somehow.)

r.

8 notes:

  1. Nice to see you back. We don't know each other, and that's the weird thing about blogs; you can find a blog to follow by chance and get hooked on the details shared by someone across the ocean, who you've never met and probably never will. I hope your break wasn't because of any negative feedback. That's another weirdness that can come with blogging.
    Anyway, I wanted to let you know that you create a gentle atmosphere with your writing. And that's lovely. So if you do continue, well, lucky us. Thanks for the sharing.

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    1. nice to meet you, thank you for saying hello! you know, i've had quite a positive blogging experience lately. most of the negativity comes from my own mind i think. it's insidious and so hard to ignore. but after letting things just rest and settle and dwell for a bit, i am very glad to be back.

      i'll be making coffee shortly, how do you take yours?

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  2. I'm glad you're back! I've missed your words and your photographs and have wondered about how your house is changing now that the weather has started to change in earnest. The thing about your blog is that you can please yourself with what you do there and if readers are fortunate enough to find you, they'll stop and visit. And you get to ignore or block those few that get obnoxious.

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    1. hello lovely! i will have to do a house post once i get myself situated here. i have no idea if looking back at the last month of progress is going to look like big changes, or like a whole lot of nothing. always moving forward though.

      i'd love to look back at this blog and see something pleasing and worthwhile. i think i was drifting a bit here and that's what i found so frustrating. but i will always count myself lucky to have wonderful readers like you. xo.

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  3. Coffee? There's a time difference, it's a beautiful sunny evening and I'm on the Chardonnay right now. But I start the day with a large, stovetop-made coffee with plenty of frothed-up milk. If I need perking up later I'll take an espresso with sugar and a small glass of water.

    And, I'm glad your blogging experience is mostly positive! Quite right too.

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  5. Glad to see you are back. It's all good stuff. Love your store, a mix of crafting and old. Joan

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    1. thank you kindly, it's a pleasure to have you here!

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